Invincible Toolboxes

I like to think I’m the token nice teammate around here. Everyone else really wants to destroy the world, or even worse, and I’m just here wanting humanity to thrive and become the dominant species in the galaxy. And if that involves them mutating into hideous, bug creatures, then is that really so bad? If only a few people mutated in hideous creatures, it would be weird. They’d be shunned, despite their magnificence, and I fully-grasp human emotions so I get that. But if EVERYONE mutated into bug creatures with the ability to breathe fire and survive in the vacuum of space…well, that’d just be the new normal.

And here I am working on aluminium toolbox central locking. It’s not quite the same as my previous work, but at least they let me play around with science, within strict limits. You can’t do that in a vacuum. We’ve been tasked this week with creating a form of toolbox central locking that’s nigh-impossible to crack. That sounds pretty simple, until I remembered that as brilliant as we all are at most facets of science, that also serves to make our jobs more of a challenge. We’re trying to create toolbox locking that WE cannot crack. Is it even possible for a bunch of super geniuses to create a lock that the same super geniuses can’t get into? I don’t know, but it’s absolutely fascinating. Almost like we’re being pitted against each other, like we’re giant bugs fighting for supremacy and the next meal.

So, the locks we’ve created are extremely secure, but not secure enough, if you get me. This toolbox needs to be secure enough to hold all the tools of the industry- aluminum accessories, sets of tools, and sandwiches- but impenetrable to anyone without the proper credentials. Also, impervious to wear and tear, including sunlight. That wasn’t on the brief…we just like to go above and beyond.

-E.R. Malcolm